The Horrors in the Back-Up Harddrive

I recently did a search of my computer to find some old, old document that was lost. In the process, I discovered some amazing, embarrassing, and hilarious pieces of Stephanie history from high school, college, and grad school. Behold the splendor.

  • For college assignments I really hated, I’d title them something normal like “Abraham Lincoln Essay” and in parentheses write “(from hell).”

  • In English 101, I had to write an essay that required us to argue the opposite of something we believed. Of course it was about Harry Potter. That title


  • I have written some absolutely appalling short stories in my time. I don't think it ever crossed my mind that I wasn't being, like, totally deep and meaningful. I'm also fairly certain I didn't know the definition of the word "enigmatic" at the time I wrote this. It just felt right.
  • I was once able to write entire essays in French. This one was about studying in Paris. 


  • At one point, I wrote an essay for my MFA program on the "ordinary-man-turned-spy" trope in spy literature. I didn’t know I knew this much about spy literature. I didn't even know I knew the word trope.

  • At the end of my first creative writing class, I had to write a reflection. It's weird in the extreme to read this seven years later. The last line is killer. 


  • There have been A LOT of versions of Minnow. This is from when Minnow was titled The Handless Maiden


I hope you have an...enigmatic day.